Conflict # 54 – Why We Fear Conflict

People avoid conflict for lots of reasons, all having to do with anxiety – the fear that something bad could happen. For such folks, the anxiety leads to negative self-talk. Here are some examples: I’m in trouble. I… Read More

Conflict # 53 – Baggage

The baggage we carry – that is, our unresolved personal issues – has the potential to affect every aspect of our lives. In addition to wreaking havoc with relationships, unfinished business can affect workplace interactions, spending habits, driving… Read More

Conflict # 52 – Respect for Emotions

The names in the following story are fictitious; the situation, however, is factual. Joe and Mary, married with two young children, came for help due to major conflict with his father. Joe’s parents, Dan and Carol, had never… Read More

Conflict # 51 – Empathy

“Don’t judge a person until you’ve walked a mile in his shoes.” Once upon a time in the 1960’s, George Wallace served as the Governor of Alabama. A racist through and through, he bitterly fought to prevent integration… Read More

Conflict # 50 – Projection

In a previous article, making incorrect assumptions was identified as a source of conflict. Let’s look at just one particularly damaging assumption. That incorrect assumption is that the other person is like you; and if he’s not, that… Read More

Conflict # 49 – Double Your Treasure

In my endeavor to help people with problems, I use something which I call the “Two-Track” approach: Track 1 and Track 2. The reason for this approach is simple. Everyone who comes for help says something like, “I… Read More

Conflict # 48 – Prevention

Group-against-group conflicts have existed throughout history. They are imprinted onto our world, as a color-fast dye becomes a permanent part of a fabric. Some have been resolved, but, as mentioned in a recent article, other conflicts appear impossible… Read More

Conflict # 47 – “One Down” Wins

A big ego can block conflict resolution. Now, just to be clear, in this case “big ego” refers to the need be on top, to be the center of attention, the “winner”. So, how can we approach such… Read More

Conflict # 46 – The No-Win Conflict

Thinking of the conflicts throughout your life, have you ever made a bad decision that added fuel to the fire? I’m referring to one particular bad decision; that is, the decision to keep addressing a conflict over which… Read More

Conflict # 45 – The Impact of Trauma

Psychological trauma has far-reaching effects. So that we’re on the same page, let’s be clear: what is trauma, actually? Psychological trauma is a condition, in response to a past event(s) that leave the victim with painful feelings, memories,… Read More