Conflict # 15 – Stay Focused
“We talk and talk, and don’t get anywhere. We always end up where we started. It’s so frustrating!” Has this ever happened in your relationship? For couples and families who experience a lot of conflict, it’s a common complaint.
When trying to resolve a conflict …
Keep it simple. Address one thing at a time. Do not pile issue upon issue.
Slow the communication down; give the other person time to follow your thinking and time to respond. Slow down your speech; and much more importantly, slow down your reaction time when the other person says something you don’t like.
Do not stray from the topic. Going off on tangents is a waste of time and energy.
Do not dredge up the past. This is one of the most destructive things you can do when arguing. Dredging up the past shows that you can’t or won’t let go. Thus, the other person doubts your ability to make peace.
If you lose focus and begin to feel agitated, stop talking! Take a break, and after you’ve regained focus, pick up the conversation.
There’s a lot to remember when you’re trying to work things out. But if you allow me to help, you’d be surprised at what you could learn. Call me at 219-309-3928 for a free consultation. I’d be honored to be of assistance.
Thanks for reading!