Conflict # 53 – Baggage
The baggage we carry – that is, our unresolved personal issues – has the potential to affect every aspect of our lives. In addition to wreaking havoc with relationships, unfinished business can affect workplace interactions, spending habits, driving behaviors … you name it.
Ray and Deanna (not their real names), a middle-aged married couple, came for marital therapy. She has three grown children from previous relationships, he has three of his own, and they have one together. It was her idea to see a therapist. The reason was that she could no longer tolerate his angry, uncontrolled, non-stop outbursts. They were both unhappy; and, while they wanted help, they had no idea where to begin. It’s no wonder. These two people had problems of their own which began long before they met.
As a young girl, Deanna had been molested by a close family member. After her parents divorced, her stepfather abused her. She has not fully recovered. Ray, on the other hand, suffered severe emotional distress due to his ex-wife’s infidelity. He has not fully recovered. They’re both carrying emotional baggage, and lots of it.
So many people are plagued by memories that haven’t been laid to rest. Isn’t it bad enough that the victims haven’t been able to let go, and they continue to suffer for years? Why should the destructive impact of emotional baggage be so harmful to personal relationships?
The reasons are too numerous to discuss in a short article. However, if this issue of unfinished business is creating problems for you, there’s something you need to know: help is available. Your past does not necessarily dictate your present or your future.
If you’d like to know more about that, please call me at 219-309-3928 for a free consultation. I would be honored to talk with you.
Thanks for reading!