Many of us have felt it. ‘It’ too much. ‘I  can’t cope. The weight of the world is coming down on me.’ Some people panic; others feel depressed or angry. Still others just give up.

One factor seems to make matters worse. That is, when the person feels uncertain,  confused and cannot think clearly. He doubts his judgment, no longer knows what to believe and what to do. The pressure is intense. She feels helpless and hopeless.

The problem increases further if such thoughts and emotions lead him to have a negative self image in general. ‘I’m stupid, a failure, worthless.’ What follow then is shame, humiliation and a the sense that this will never change.

For t he moment we will focus on one complication: confusion, leading to thoughts such as,  ‘What is right, what is wrong? Where do I start? What if I mess it up? I mess everything up.’ 

What is it that promotes the confusion? It is anxiety: the fear of what might go badly. Fear is at the root of nearly all negative feelings and experiences. What follows is one approach to overcoming confusion and the feeling of being overwhelmed.

Step 1: Challenge the belief that things will never change.

Step 2: Challenge the belief that there is something working with you.

Step 3: Get educated about how to re-wire your thinking. The evidence is solid. It is possible.

Step 4: Undertake a plan of daily practices aimed at helping you maintain a feeling of calm and balance. This may involve a life style change.

Step 5: List your problems in order of importance.  Get help if needed, to put a plan in place.

Step 6: Address one problem at a time. Do not start with the hardest problem. 

In general avoid contact, if possible, with people who are not good for you. Learn to weigh other people’s opinions so that you can choose whom to trust. Do not share your issues with too many people. One or two trusted supporters should do. Simplify your life. Notice whether you are taking on too much at one time. Notice whether your thoughts, beliefs and opinions are based on facts.

For some folks, the negativity is so deeply ingrained that professional help is indicated. If this speaks to you, and if you are ready to feel strong, clear and confident,  please feel free to reach out. The phone number is (219) 309-3 928. It would be an honor to be of service.

For more thoughts click Self Regulation

Thanks for reading!